Old Ladies: Starting to piss me off

Here's the scenario:

It's Monday night after working a grueling day at a nursing home full of old ladies (including those senile ones who talk to themselves). Now, I'm not mad at THOSE old ladies. They really can't help themselves. But, even after a while, it all starts to get a bit creepy and such. (And those places just tend to have that weird "old people" smell that also makes you feel naucious)

I'm once again slated to volunteer to help work at a monthly Bingo night for charity. (Explaining takes up too much time, so just stay with me. Assume I'm doing this out of the kindness of my heart and we'll just move along.)

My job is to sell "pull-tabs". You may call them "bankers". Or you may have no idea that I'm even talking about. So, to explain in as few words as possible, think of these things as a mini-lottery you sell to old ladies for a buck a piece so they can try and win a few hundred dollars. (Yeah, I don't understand the allure either.)

So I'm selling these nearly non-stop. I'm already exhausted and ready to kill several innocent cardboard boxes just for looking at me funny. (Hey, they woulda deserved it too!)

Now, these old ladies who buy these things don't normally buy them a few at a time. Oh no, that would be too easy. They sometimes buy 20-50 at a time. Then other old ladies get mad at me when they yell for my services when I "take too long." (And, since I hate math on many levels and impatient people, here's where I start to loose my cool)

Note to the Old Ladies: Last time I checked, there are more of you than me (at least a 60/1 ratio at any given time), So...


GET THE HELL OFF MY BACK BEFORE I KICK YOU ALL IN THE FACE WITH A RUSTY PAIR OF SOCCER CLEATS!!!






Ok, I feel much better now.

~Nate-O

(PS: I have only five more entries before I crack the 100 mark. I need entry-fodder people. Send me suggestions, funny stories, or just a word or two for me to use. Trust me, I'll use it.)