Hey animal lovers,
I'm bored and don't want to study for my French test I have in the morning. So, instead, lets give out some random facts, deep thoughts, and other stupid crap to keep me occupied for the next half-hour. (Any of my comments are in parenthesis.)
-During the Middle Ages, probably one of the biggest mistakes was not putting on your armor because you were "just going down to the corner." ~Jack Handy
-The tongue of the anteater is over 2 feet long, kissy kissy.
-The original Guinness Brewery in Dublin, Ireland has a six thousand year lease. (So drink up bitches!)
-"I should've been a plumber."~Albert Einstein (Hell yeah Al, you woulda known where all the secret mushrooms were hidden!)
- "The word 'genius' isn't applicable in football. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."~Joe Theisman, quarterback and sports analyst (Hilarious)
- No word in the English language rhymes with month. (Songwriters beware!)
- Ohio is listed as the 17th state in the U.S., but technically it is number 47. Until August 7, 1953, congress forgot to vote on a resolution to admit Ohio to the Union. (Fuck you Ohio.)
-Only humans and horses have hymens. (And you know something... I bet there is someone on this planet who can say he's popped the cherry of both a human female and a female horse... and that person's name is Vin Diesel.)
- The Ramses brand condom is named after the great phaoroh Ramses II who fathered over 160 children. (And was probably such an asshole that he didn't pay a penny of child support.)
-The saying "it's so cold out there it could freeze the balls off a brass monkey" came from when they had old cannons like ones used in the Civil War. The cannonballs were stacked in a pyramid formation, called a brass monkey. When it got extremely cold outside they would crackand break off... Thus the saying. (That is now my favorite winter saying.)
-A 'jiffy' is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second. (It's also the time it takes for Skippy to have sex with himself.)
-23. That's the number of people Mr. T has pitied in the time it has taken you to read this sentence.
-Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris.
-Mr.T once punched Chuck Norris at the exact moment he roundhouse kicked Mr.T in the chest. The result was the 80's.
-It takes 14 puppeteers to make Vin Diesel smile, but only 2 to make him destroy an orphanage.
POA: 56%
Honorable Mentions
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Robby: Cheers to my new roommate. Again.
Molly: Count me in for some mayhem, I could use it.
Me: Somebody should post a random fact about me. It should reflect how freaking awesome I am.
Boredom is my anti-drug,
~Nate-O
2 comments:
Nate-O once saved fourteen small Irish children, five adorable puppies and two fat nuns from a burning orphanage in China...
Now how's that for an f-ing sweet random fact.
(and...I use the word "fact" very very loosely)
In the event of too much pleasure, Nathan's penis is equipped with an emergency rip cord. To date it has saved over 1,000 women from never having "good" sex again.
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