I have a job for this week. It's outdoor work doing oddjobs around my Dad's boss's house. Yesterday was my first day and it sucked a big huge donkey wang. (metaphorically of course)
But I'm usually not one to shy away from 9 bucks an hour. So I'll endure the seething crap of this job for a few days. At least until I finish or go crazy and try to kill Martha Stewart. Hopefully I can get both accomplished sometime soon.
So I was powersanding my boss's garage door today so I can revarnish it. Being that it was a pretty boring job, my mind wandered quite a bit. I think the most prevailing thought was Porn.
Not necessarily the art, but the people involved. The "stars" as they like to call themselves.
I got to wondering, "Could I be a porn star?"
The following things would have to happen:
1. A slightly bigger wang would have to develop in my pants. I mean, not that I have a small dick, but I doubt mine is big enough to statisfy the fans of porn.
2. Get a good tan. I'm a pasty sonofabitch, so I'd need at least a pseudo-tan to get into the business.
3. More expierience. I've only had sex once, and even then I was drunk. I'd need to have sex with at lest 45 more ladies to say I have the ExP to garner a nod into pornos.
Jeez, I think about some pretty fucked up stuff at work.
BTW: There is a guy in the MLB named "Cocoa Crisp" (This is Hilarious- so laugh you bastard)
Also BTW: Star Wars opens tomorrow. I wanna go see it. (Not so Hilarious- unless I jizz in my pants while seeing the movie. Then you can laugh)
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