The taste of condoms....

Hey friends and well-wishers,

I hope everyone is doing well. Me? Can't complain too much... since I've done it enough in previous posts. So I won't bore my faithful readers from any more... at least in this post.

So I've recently been addicted to playing "Star Wars - Battlefront" on my Playstation. Since I've let Jake and Rob borrow it for the semester, and since the game is Rob's, that's where I gotta play it. And it's fun!

At first, I thought it was pretty stupid. Considering I'd never played it before and had very few expectations. But, after a few weeks, it's become like crack... only better.

Anyways, Tony was playing the game with Jake, Molly, and I as spectators. We we're all having a pretty good time criticizing Tony's strategies and making fun of him as usual. Let's face it, we all do it... and I'm willing to bet my left kidney that a majority of us enjoy it. (Why my left kidney? Cause I think I wouldn't need it in the long run.)

Sometime during the game, Billy comes in and asks for a balloon to do an experiment. Jake admits he has none and suggests Billy uses a condom. Billy takes the advice and thanks Jake for his insight and wisdom.

For some reason, Jake magically whips out a condom from out of nowhere. Maybe it's just magical to me since I was reading something at the time. Anyways, after ripping it open and putting it on his hand for several minutes, Molly suggests he chews on it....

This is where I think we need to explain a few things.

Jake has an unnatural affinity for the taste of rubber. He just likes the smell and taste of it. He chews on rubber bands and stuff! I learned about this sometime last semester... and that was an interesting time of my life.

At the same time I found out about this "fetish", we got into a discussion about if condoms were made of rubber instead of latex that Jake would go gay just to enjoy the taste of condoms without suffering too much ridicule. Of course, I figured he was just kidding and pushed the memory to the back of my mind.

So, timewarp to just about 40 minutes ago from the time I write this entry. Jake proceeds to chew on the condom at the suggestion of Molly.

Thankfully most of the lubricant has been expunged after being on Jake's hand. And, according to Mr. King, the condom "doesn't taste bad."

You know, after being weirded out for a few minutes, I came to the conclusions that I'm glad to have friends like Jake. Because those are the kind of people you can tell stories about for the rest of your life.

God damn I love college...

Current PoA: 46%
Previous PoA: 41%

Honorable Mentions:

-Jake: You condom-eating S.O.B., you crack me up!

-Tony: We're not laughing with you, we're laughing at you... (yeah, so that was a little mean... but that's OK cause it's Tony)

-Chewbacca: You're the coolest Wookiee ever, can I have your autograph?

-Me: (stands up) Hello, my name is Nate-O and I'm addicted to "Star Wars Battlefront"


Laugh it up, fuzzball,

Nate-O

===

Retrospective from 2008


I don't know why I gave Tony so much shit back in the day. He might have been a little wierd, but so was I. So, if Tony reads this, many apologies dude. No hard feelings I hope.

However, Jake and the Condom is a moment in my life that I will always cherish. It pretty much solidified my friendship with Jake because I've very rarely laughed so hard at something so rediculous... yes, even Meatspin dot com.

So cheers to Jake King once again... one of my best friends!


~Nate-O from 2008